Back to Basics

In Coaching 101, we were given an exercise using a Styrofoam cup. It’s a simple exercise but very powerful. Take the test for yourself below.

Imagine holding a Styrofoam cup full of water in your hand. Now as you read through a few questions, I want you to take note of the number of times you answer “yes”.

  1. Are there relationships in your family that are stressful?
  2. Are there struggles at work that directly affect you?
  3. Do you have aging parents that need your attention?
  4. Do you often feel the need to defend your actions or ideas to someone?
  5. Are you dealing with the pain of losing someone?
  6. Do you want to find another job but don’t know where to start?
  7. Do you feel helpless in helping your children or people you care about?
  8. Are there times you want to just scream?
  9. Do you often feel unhappy?
  10. Do you sometimes want to run and hide?
  11. Do you feel you have no control over anything?
  12. Are you feeling frustrated because of a situation?
  13. Do you just want to find some peace in your life?
  14. Anything else putting a hole in your cup?

How many times did you say yes?

The Styrofoam cup is your personal foundation, just like the foundation of a house. Now imagine a tiny hole being placed in your cup for each “yes”. If there is only one hole, the water will seep out slowly. That water is your energy and the slow seepage is an energy drain. Now imagine the number of holes equal to the number of times you said “yes”. The water will drain quicker with each hole. Your energy drains. Your resilience slowly diminishes and eventually you are left with an empty container. A mere shell of your former self.

If your foundation is not strong, you will not be able to withstand the wear and tear of everyday life. Erosion may be slow but it is inevitable. Many of us, especially women, think we can do it all! We even think we are supposed to. Until one day, when the water has drained, we realize we can’t or maybe just don’t want to anymore.

“She inspires everyone around her to be their very best”

Lesia is a gifted coach who is filled with grace. She is a magnificent role model who walks her talk… and then some! She inspires everyone around her to be their very best. Her clients and colleagues alike are empowered by the way she gently challenges them to give life all they’ve got. It was an honor to be Lesia’s coach. I learned a lot from her and I am becoming a better person for having her in my life. With Gratitude and Respect!
~Chrissy Carew, Master Certified Coach (New Hampshire)


I was once “Superwoman”. At least I thought I was. I discovered it was only a figment of my imagination. The water completely drained more than once. I have had to fight my way back a few times.

Soul Fire Café was created to help others find their strength, improve their lives, their relationships with friends, family and significant others but most importantly, their relationship with themselves. The stronger your foundation, the stronger your relationships. We help you fill the holes and rebuild.

“You saved my life”

This Grief Recovery workshop has allowed me to release the negative feelings I had about myself and my life up until this point. It’s allowed me closure for the past and allowed me to concentrate on the present making the future a happy possibility of things to come. It helped me focus on issues that are important and has quieted the mental confusion. Thank you. You saved my life.
~Duncan (Winnipeg)


If you need an ear to really “hear” you and your story, I invite you to set up a complimentary Possibility Session to see what’s possible for you.

Email or call (204) 257-3334 to schedule a suitable time to have your free session. I look forward to hearing you.

And always, Dare to be You!!